Two of my office colleagues have gone crazy today. They are speaking lispingly & at some stage it sounds like they don’t even know what they are saying but it is kind of funny but I am not feeling well so I can’t enjoy any of this today. My beautiful mind is working like spinning washing machine & having a sever headache that is not helping me at all to understand things today. Yes you can say I have gone mad but not completely still under process. Even my colleagues are complaining that I’m not enjoying it or not being a part of it but honestly my brain is out today, maybe gone on vacation.
Did you know that today all the office was one hour late on the job? Well! Not all of them but 99% of us were late. Do you know that? Wow! Even I did not know that so how could you. Well! We work with UK timings in the office as we work for a UK base company & in UK the daylight saving timings were changed yesterday but no one from the UK end informed us so we were all late. One of the colleagues did inform us few days back that timings will change but we forgot on the weekend as no memo/email was sent to us by the UK team.
Wednesday is not that far & why am I reminding myself as it is going to be India Pakistan World Cup Cricket Semi Finals. The whole country is excited & not just me. Well! Actually both the countries are excited & waiting for the day to come. Now the question who will win is a tough one. India being “The Favorite” has a great chance to win due to strong batting line-up as well as the support of their home ground. On the other hand Pakistan being “The Unpredictable” can do anything. So let’s see what happens & hope to have a good match instead of one sided match. The only fear I have is that who ever loss, that team will face too much criticism & the anger of the crowd. When will be that time when the people of these countries will start taking cricket as a game & not as a war? One will have to loose in the end anyway. I did watch the news on an Indian News Channel that the Indian Team will loose the match due to match fixing. They even spotted a famous Mumbai bookie at the dressing room of the Indian Team. If this is the truth then why no action has been taken so far from the Indian Cricket Authorities and where is the ICC now?
Monday, March 28, 2011
Friday, March 25, 2011
DAY 687
Sometimes it really gets hard to accept the reality of life. You can see it all in front of you & still you don’t accept it. How to accept? It is like a war between the mind & the brain. Mind says you have lost but the heart still gives you a hope to win. Questions are always popping up from nowhere but answers are never found.
Sometimes I feel if I could go back & change the time but honestly its’ not possible anymore. Two reasons… one, watch is now out of order since long & I never got it repaired and second, even if I change the time, nothing will be changed.
Sometimes pain inside me freezes my hand while typing & sometimes my pain gives me the flow to write all what I want. A friend of mine always reminds me how clever I am when I cover up things but creating words or when I say everything in a single word without saying anything. I really don’t know if I am capable of that but thanks for the compliments.
Sometimes to be very honest I don’t want to say anything & even then I do say it all to people which I should not. People get impress of me while I chat with them & I have no idea why & how come but what I know is that most of them do get hurt a lot with my words very single time. I think I should change me style of chat so people should know the real me who is not good at all, who can hurt anyone with words, who is just one another ordinary human and who is non other than me.
Sometimes is the word by the way that I have used today in the beginning of every paragraph which I don’t know if you noticed but if you did than its not only me who is clever, you are also one of us…
Sometimes I feel if I could go back & change the time but honestly its’ not possible anymore. Two reasons… one, watch is now out of order since long & I never got it repaired and second, even if I change the time, nothing will be changed.
Sometimes pain inside me freezes my hand while typing & sometimes my pain gives me the flow to write all what I want. A friend of mine always reminds me how clever I am when I cover up things but creating words or when I say everything in a single word without saying anything. I really don’t know if I am capable of that but thanks for the compliments.
Sometimes to be very honest I don’t want to say anything & even then I do say it all to people which I should not. People get impress of me while I chat with them & I have no idea why & how come but what I know is that most of them do get hurt a lot with my words very single time. I think I should change me style of chat so people should know the real me who is not good at all, who can hurt anyone with words, who is just one another ordinary human and who is non other than me.
Sometimes is the word by the way that I have used today in the beginning of every paragraph which I don’t know if you noticed but if you did than its not only me who is clever, you are also one of us…
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
DAY 678
Extremely angry on this news that the killer of two “Raymond Davis” has just been released and now even has left the country. This is our bloody, cheap & corrupt government that let a killer escape just because he is an American. If this had been a Pakistani & the case would have been in the US, he must have been jailed somewhere under the act of terrorism. So if this is how justice is severed in this country then I would like to thank all those stupid & bloody jerks for voting this government. Hope you all will do it again & again & I should pray that you all suffer the same.
I am 500% sure that something went totally wrong & the families were forced to pardon him. If they had to pardon on the first place, they would have said so in the beginning. I’m not even sure if they are paid any sort of amount.
Regarding the stupid statements of US officials thanking the families for their “generosity” & even thanking the people of Pakistan is a nothing but a joke. In fact they are smiling & laughing inside & saying that these Pakistani people are noting but jerks. So I like to thank all of those who have participated in the release of a killer, so they can make us “Pakistanis” the most stupid people around.
So welcome to the freedom & please do keep celebrating freedom every year on 14th August and keep asking yourself that are we free??????
I am 500% sure that something went totally wrong & the families were forced to pardon him. If they had to pardon on the first place, they would have said so in the beginning. I’m not even sure if they are paid any sort of amount.
Regarding the stupid statements of US officials thanking the families for their “generosity” & even thanking the people of Pakistan is a nothing but a joke. In fact they are smiling & laughing inside & saying that these Pakistani people are noting but jerks. So I like to thank all of those who have participated in the release of a killer, so they can make us “Pakistanis” the most stupid people around.
So welcome to the freedom & please do keep celebrating freedom every year on 14th August and keep asking yourself that are we free??????
Monday, March 14, 2011
DAY 676
Here I am back on this media to share my feelings. Some of you might think I’m stupid that I keep writing all this which means nothing to you guys out there but for me, its treasure coz here what ever I write is all true and nothing but true and this true thing is my own bloody feeling.
Before I continue from where I left in my last blog, I would like to thank a few who actually read my last blog & the comments I received from them were outstanding. Oh no no, they were not standing outside and commenting :) but what ever they passed on to me in shape of words were really nice & beautiful. One of my friends read my blog for the first time although I have been writing since long but according to her, what I wrote in my last blog & the way I presented it was amazing. So thank you my dear friend.
I did forget to mention in my last blog that on the way to Tando Adam jailed inside a long train, I did manage to break my own record of 375 SMS in a day. My new score is now 517 SMS in a day. I know, I know I’m crazy but this is what I am. Well! How did I do it, hmmmm… well! A magician never tells :)
On the way back, I was unable to find a seat in the train due to which I had to skip one of the trains right from the station. So in actual I left my relative’s home twice for the station & twice I had to see sad faces with tear in their eyes. So first I left the house on Saturday night March 5th 2011. Before I was about to leave the house, one of my cousin every young in age was lying on the ground grabbing one of my leg as hard as he can & shouting that I can’t go. The other cousin was saying that he will hide my bag. The third one said I will lock the door. While a few of them praying deep inside their heart & waiting for a miracle to happen to stop me. The most difficult moment was when I had to hug my mom & say goodbye. Meeting her after 7 years for just 12 days was really unfair but what can I say. Life is life. When I hugged her she kissed on my face everywhere & I could not forget that moment ever. It is like the moment is captured in my brain just like a movie scene. So after all this, that night I left the house leaving every face in a sad mode. While walking to the station I was sad myself. One of the cousins asked me something & I was unable to answer quickly as when I was about to speak I felt the voice stuck in my throat coz of the pain of leaving people behind & especially my mom. I have twice felt this moment of voice getting stuck in my throat. Once when my father died & next was that moment. I was accompanied by my 9 male cousins and according to one of them, this was the first time ever that all the 9 brothers were going to the station to drop someone. I wonder why they created the word drop for this occasion as no one dropped me anywhere.
Reaching the station & even after buying the ticket, I was informed by the station master that the train is full & not even a single seat is available. So I had no choice but to miss that train & that minute all of my 9 cousins were so happy & then me & my army went back home after confirmation the next day’s seat. Before I could reach the house, the news was there that I’m back & the whole family including my mom was so happy to see me back. That night that made Halwa especially for me. Awwww… What a love I received from them.
So the happy moments were back but lasted for only hours as I had to leave next day. So the next day again I had to go through those emotional moments of saying goodbye but this time the pain was a bit less as the rehearsal was already done. That day was goodbye as that day neither I missed the train nor the train was on time. Bloody train was an hour late. That same stupid train took 29 & half hours to reach the destination which was achieved in 25 hours by the train I took to Tando Adam.
It has now been almost a week since I am back but it seems like yesterday. Almost everyday I do receive a miss call or a call from any of my cousins & SMS saying “I miss you”. Even my mom told me that since the day I left the kids were sad & they even got my pictures printed from the mobile camera & they keep watching them. This makes me speechless coz receiving love like this is a blessing. Now looking at the length of this blog, no one is going to believe me being speechless :-)
Before I continue from where I left in my last blog, I would like to thank a few who actually read my last blog & the comments I received from them were outstanding. Oh no no, they were not standing outside and commenting :) but what ever they passed on to me in shape of words were really nice & beautiful. One of my friends read my blog for the first time although I have been writing since long but according to her, what I wrote in my last blog & the way I presented it was amazing. So thank you my dear friend.
I did forget to mention in my last blog that on the way to Tando Adam jailed inside a long train, I did manage to break my own record of 375 SMS in a day. My new score is now 517 SMS in a day. I know, I know I’m crazy but this is what I am. Well! How did I do it, hmmmm… well! A magician never tells :)
On the way back, I was unable to find a seat in the train due to which I had to skip one of the trains right from the station. So in actual I left my relative’s home twice for the station & twice I had to see sad faces with tear in their eyes. So first I left the house on Saturday night March 5th 2011. Before I was about to leave the house, one of my cousin every young in age was lying on the ground grabbing one of my leg as hard as he can & shouting that I can’t go. The other cousin was saying that he will hide my bag. The third one said I will lock the door. While a few of them praying deep inside their heart & waiting for a miracle to happen to stop me. The most difficult moment was when I had to hug my mom & say goodbye. Meeting her after 7 years for just 12 days was really unfair but what can I say. Life is life. When I hugged her she kissed on my face everywhere & I could not forget that moment ever. It is like the moment is captured in my brain just like a movie scene. So after all this, that night I left the house leaving every face in a sad mode. While walking to the station I was sad myself. One of the cousins asked me something & I was unable to answer quickly as when I was about to speak I felt the voice stuck in my throat coz of the pain of leaving people behind & especially my mom. I have twice felt this moment of voice getting stuck in my throat. Once when my father died & next was that moment. I was accompanied by my 9 male cousins and according to one of them, this was the first time ever that all the 9 brothers were going to the station to drop someone. I wonder why they created the word drop for this occasion as no one dropped me anywhere.
Reaching the station & even after buying the ticket, I was informed by the station master that the train is full & not even a single seat is available. So I had no choice but to miss that train & that minute all of my 9 cousins were so happy & then me & my army went back home after confirmation the next day’s seat. Before I could reach the house, the news was there that I’m back & the whole family including my mom was so happy to see me back. That night that made Halwa especially for me. Awwww… What a love I received from them.
So the happy moments were back but lasted for only hours as I had to leave next day. So the next day again I had to go through those emotional moments of saying goodbye but this time the pain was a bit less as the rehearsal was already done. That day was goodbye as that day neither I missed the train nor the train was on time. Bloody train was an hour late. That same stupid train took 29 & half hours to reach the destination which was achieved in 25 hours by the train I took to Tando Adam.
It has now been almost a week since I am back but it seems like yesterday. Almost everyday I do receive a miss call or a call from any of my cousins & SMS saying “I miss you”. Even my mom told me that since the day I left the kids were sad & they even got my pictures printed from the mobile camera & they keep watching them. This makes me speechless coz receiving love like this is a blessing. Now looking at the length of this blog, no one is going to believe me being speechless :-)
Thursday, March 10, 2011
DAY 672
Almost a month gap from my blog & almost 2 weeks of gap from the internet. I think this was my first longest gap from internet ever.
So I am back from a 2 week long trip. Tando Adam & the people there I met was a great moment. After 7 years I met my mom & she did not recognize me. Wow! Isn’t that sad? Well! According to her she found me bit taller, handsome & smart. I was wearing kurta on jeans & that was another point that my mom got confused as 7 years back I never wear it. So after 3-4 hours my mom actually accepted that yes I am her son. I even joked that I can show you my ID card that I am your son.
My mom also went through an eye operation and thanks GOD I was with her as I was the only kid in the family & the only person that was waiting outside the operation theater tensed for almost 45 minutes. The operation went all fine by the blessing of Allah & the prayers of friends & family.
7 years is a long time & during those moments my mom & my family went through very tough times just because of me & I am not sure how to make it up to them but I am really sorry for all that. I did even have a chance to speak to my younger brother on the phone & thanks GOD now we are friends on FB. Today I saw all of his pics & wow! I have one cute & handsome brother. I even noticed that he is 1 inch taller than me. Ouch! That hurts :).
After almost 7 years I even got a chance to send SMS to my younger sister during my mom’s operation. Almost after 8-9 years I again went to Tando Adam & once again I got the chance to meet my cousins & family. Wow! I will have to say that the love that they gave me was something I can’t write in words. Every one in the family from the youngest to the eldest was loving towards me. It was a moment not to forget.
During my stay I had a chance to visit match & cloth factory. The process of how a match stick & the match box is made was great. I even had a chance to visit the sub jail of that city. One of my cousins works there & made arrangements for my visit. I even met a few prisoners & one of them even offered me a cup of tea which I rejected by saying thanks. The main problem I was facing during the conversation with the prisoners was that I could not even ask them how is life & how are you. Those are insulting questions for a prisoner. I even got the chance to visit my grand mother & one of my cousin’s grave for the first time. I even visited the grave of the famous Sufi poet “Shah Abdul Latif Bhittai” for the first time. I even had a chance to visit Hyderabad but that was just for few hours only.
So all the moments were nice except the one when I was about to leave. Regarding that I will write in my next blog…
So I am back from a 2 week long trip. Tando Adam & the people there I met was a great moment. After 7 years I met my mom & she did not recognize me. Wow! Isn’t that sad? Well! According to her she found me bit taller, handsome & smart. I was wearing kurta on jeans & that was another point that my mom got confused as 7 years back I never wear it. So after 3-4 hours my mom actually accepted that yes I am her son. I even joked that I can show you my ID card that I am your son.
My mom also went through an eye operation and thanks GOD I was with her as I was the only kid in the family & the only person that was waiting outside the operation theater tensed for almost 45 minutes. The operation went all fine by the blessing of Allah & the prayers of friends & family.
7 years is a long time & during those moments my mom & my family went through very tough times just because of me & I am not sure how to make it up to them but I am really sorry for all that. I did even have a chance to speak to my younger brother on the phone & thanks GOD now we are friends on FB. Today I saw all of his pics & wow! I have one cute & handsome brother. I even noticed that he is 1 inch taller than me. Ouch! That hurts :).
After almost 7 years I even got a chance to send SMS to my younger sister during my mom’s operation. Almost after 8-9 years I again went to Tando Adam & once again I got the chance to meet my cousins & family. Wow! I will have to say that the love that they gave me was something I can’t write in words. Every one in the family from the youngest to the eldest was loving towards me. It was a moment not to forget.
During my stay I had a chance to visit match & cloth factory. The process of how a match stick & the match box is made was great. I even had a chance to visit the sub jail of that city. One of my cousins works there & made arrangements for my visit. I even met a few prisoners & one of them even offered me a cup of tea which I rejected by saying thanks. The main problem I was facing during the conversation with the prisoners was that I could not even ask them how is life & how are you. Those are insulting questions for a prisoner. I even got the chance to visit my grand mother & one of my cousin’s grave for the first time. I even visited the grave of the famous Sufi poet “Shah Abdul Latif Bhittai” for the first time. I even had a chance to visit Hyderabad but that was just for few hours only.
So all the moments were nice except the one when I was about to leave. Regarding that I will write in my next blog…
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