Last night I spoke to my mother after a very long time. It was nice to hear her voice. We did plan to do voice chat with webcam on Saturday but unfortunately my internet at home is not working now & I have been informed that it will be fixed till Monday as some equipment was burnt & could not be replaced as shops are closed for EID holidays.
Did not have a good day today. I am not me today. Been acting so strange. I have not been talking to anyone even in the family & ignoring chats & SMS conversations. I don’t know what is gone wrong with me. I just feel not talking to anyone at all. First time ever on EID I have acted so strange. I really don’t feel the happiness of this moment anymore. Maybe I have completely died inside me. I am not sure but something inside me is definitely wrong. Even a close friend complained today & said that I have closed myself in me & I am not even sharing anything with him which makes him concern, angry & sad at the same time as he feels I don’t trust him anymore. It is not about trust. It is just that I don’t want anyone to know who I am & what I am anymore. Even sometimes I don’t even know myself that who am I.
Anyway… I feel like I am a stranger in this world. So EID MUBARAK to all my fellow Muslims from this stranger.
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