Last 3 days I have learnt a lot. I have learnt how I act in my anger. I have learnt never to be rude to people you love. I even learnt how to forgive others & ask for forgiveness. These were the tough moments but they have taught me a lot.
Last night when I was trying to sleep, somehow I had a flashback of the moments I had with one of my friend on the hiking tracks. She is still angry with me as I deserve that coz I had been rude to her for no reason. That memory actually made me send her a message of sorry again. I know sometimes its not easy to forgive but when you take your mind back into the past & try to search for that one best moment you have with other, a smile appear on your face & drops of tears from your eyes fall down. That is the moment you forgive & that is the moment you can even ask for forgiveness coz at that moment you feel what you have lost.
I have decided that if I ever got anger in me again, I will just walk away & will request my love ones not to talk to me for sometimes as I really don’t want to hurt feelings of people I love & care for. We do say a lot in anger but half of the things we don’t even mean it. I said a lot too that night but it was mostly in anger & the reasons those words or thoughts came out of my mind was the pain I had that day & the way pain converted into anger. I wish my friends (Still not sure I have lost them or not) had understood that I was just going through a stupid phase of pain & anger.
Well! What’s gone is gone, what’s done is done. At least I made one of them realize that he hurt me & the other one made me realize that I hurt her. I know I should have not done what I did but honestly it was just a natural human reaction. Ok! I know in anger I’m not a human, I turn into a devil or something similar to that. I think I need “Anger Management” classes… Once again I’m really sorry for hurting the feelings & being rude to my love ones. Hope they will forgive me…
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